MBAs Speak Their Mind

THUS SPAKE IIMBITES (in 1984)- results of a survey we did back then.

At IIM, Bangalore, we like English movies more than any other kind. Here, girls expect to live longer than guys. Girls do not smoke, drink...... The smokers exhibit no brand preference when it is a borrowed cigarette. Next to that they prefer Wills Filter (subject to availability at Uncle's). Guys go for girls who have high proficiency in English, can cook well and do not touch drinks, drugs, alcohol, cigarettes (hold it, this is for marital purposes only !). Girls apparently want intelligent Mr. Brains who will be faithful and good at washing dishes. And if they are filthy, stinking rich and tough and good - looking in the bargain, that will certainly help. Despite O.R. and Effective Communication, a large majority of the people felt IIMB was a fantastic experience.

Here are the details:
Movies are ranked in the following order:
English, American, Hindi Arty, Hindi Masala, Regional, Management Movies.
The following are the stars IIMBites adore:
Hindi : Naseeruddin Shah, Rekha
English : Dustin Hoffman / Sharu Rangnekar (Management Movies), Audrey Hepburn (we still believe in fair ladies)

An average IIMBite expects to live till 68 years 3 months and 11 days. The girls expect to grace this earth until they are 72 years 9 months and 2 days. Guys expect to foul it up until 67 years 8 months and 25 days.

36% of the junta smokes. The following is the brand preference:
1. Borrowed fags (of any brand)
2. Wills Filter
3. Charms
4. Gold Flake
5. Pipe
6. Scissors
7. Charminar (The other brands are not supplied by Uncle)

Following are the spouse specifications on a five-point scale.
Wanted for young, handsome executive, MBA, rich bridegroom, a girl with the following attributes with the following degree of preference:
1. Good height : 2.1
2. Susceptibility' to drinks, drugs, alcohol, fags : 0.7
3. Antipathy to drinks, drugs, alcohol, cigarettes : 4.0
4. Homeliness : 1.5
5. Comeliness : 3.5
6. M. B. A. (IIM / Bajaj / XL) : 0.3
7. Proficiency in English : 4.0
8. Proficiency in Hindi : 2.1
9. Proficiency in Cobolese : 1.0
10. Culinary abilities : 4.8
11. Intelligence : 3.5
12. Imbecility : 1.0

Wanted for young, beautiful, angelic, voluble MBA girl, a bridegroom with the following attributes with the following degree of preference:
Good height : 4.1
Looks : 3.2
Susceptibility to drinks, drugs, alcohol, cigarettes : 0.5
Faithful : 4.9
IIM degree : 1.5
Expertise in washing dishes : 3.8
Intelligence : 4.5
Pecuniary Position : 3.2

For 46% of the populace IIMB was a fantastic, out-of-the-world, mind-blowing experience, 22% found it nothing to write home about, 30% adopt a tolerant attitude, grin-and-bear-it. Only 2% were positive that Dante's 'inferno' was nothing compared to what they went through here.

Create Something That Americans Want to Copy

Guy Kawasaki (a favourite author of mine) said this in reply to a question from an Indian interviewing him on TV in India recently. He also said the following-

On Fake news- It is whatever news you disagree with-only sometime later do you really know if its fake.

On the origin of Facebook- Facebook started because Mark wanted a date, and not because he thought the world needed a new method of communication.

On Entrepreneurs Selling Out- They want to make money, and improvement to people's lives is a by-product.

On Big Data- Big data does not have all the answers-it can also be all lies.

Successful Investing- Most investors don't know which idea will succeed. In retrospect, they claim that this idea was backed by a good team, blah, blah, blah.. For one (investment in) Google that succeeded, many failed.

Hyderabad Public School

This was HPS Ramanthapur, which I attended from 1972 till 1977, first at its temporary campus in Punjagutta, and then at its permanent location. I learnt many things here, starting from looking after myself -it was residential. Getting by on limited rations apart from the mess food, and the compulsory physical activity kept me healthy and disciplined. Study hours were also fixed, but so were the sports timings. As I played cricket, we actually played a lot on Sundays too. On the rare occasions that we were allowed to go out, I remember seeing some films like Sholay and Shareef Badmash, and Guns of Navarone in the excellent theatres at Hyderabad...lots more came later at Osmania engineering college!



Also, the debates, quizzes and library which was well-stocked, kept us engaged. I was reading the news (usually the sports news, because I could also cover our own matches), and that stood me in good stead when I became a reporter who wrote about sports at IIM Bangalore while doing my MBA a few years later. We also had an early exposure to the photography lab, and this got strengthened with a similar lab in college later.

Writing happened on a regular basis after I reached IIM B, and editing a magazine and year book there was an experience I will never forget!

Wonders of Social Media

If someone had told me while growing up that there would be free communication avenues to keep in touch with friends worldwide, I wouldn't have believed it. Being in a people-intensive profession (teaching), I also have students who are spread across the world, and ex-colleagues. Some of them have remained in touch since email days (they seem numbered, the email days). Many more media have appeared on the horizon since then that are better, with my favourite being fb..I know, the youngsters are groaning, again..but half the world's population can't be wrong, right?

Here's just one couple (and their cute kid) I met again due to our being in touch on social media.

But such wonderful technology was made possible by innovations in hardware and software by hundreds of different innovators, and funded by governments who may have originally developed some of it for military uses (spying, in other words). Whatever the origins, it has definitely been a Godsend for many people who like to stay in touch with people across the world. I keep saying though, that periodically, these virtual friendships benefit from a real handshake and looking into each others' eyes (not romantically, necessarily). I have had lovely meetings with students, colleagues, friends (new and old-some I met first on FB) over the last few years only thanks to their being in touch on facebook. Hope that silsila continues.. Zuckerberg bro, I am a Fan!

An aside- wherever I go, people tell me they need to win my DP Award soon, or complain about not winning it ever..my words of advice would be listen to the Gully Boy and believe in his song..Apna Time Aayega.

Excuses

They are everywhere. Individuals have them, from students to teachers, from subordinates to bosses to peers,..and from politicians to bureaucrats-in other words, the governing classes and the opposition too.

They make the world go around, in other words. The world would be much duller without them, because everything would happen on schedule, as it was planned. What is the fun in that?

Man's innate creativity needs an outlet. And generating excuses provides an excellent one. Imagine the kinds of things you have to make up for coming late to work, class, or a date! Or the relatives you have to kill or get married to sneak away for a few days from the humdrum work life.

Students, of course, have a Constitution of their own which protects them from all consequences that excuses will bring them. There is always a way out.

As you can see, I am all for excuses. I have a few of my favourites too, but will keep them to myself, so I can use them when the time comes.

Wise Words From 1984

This was the editorial we wrote for our yearbook, from 1984, written in the hallowed buildings of IIM Bangalore.

Bubbling moments. PJs bandied about with competitive zeal, Mural (the wall mag on a real wall) coming alive with yesterday's headliners.

Mimicking the Profs.. The inter-IIM trophy won in the first year and lost subsequently. Chorus chants of Beatles numbers and limericks to fill the darkness when the KEB calls the tune. Late-night efforts to bring out printed IIMBIBEs (our magazine). Finding places of solace on MG and Brigade. And discovering the mysterious ways back to the hostel.

All this and a lot more were what those two years were all about. We will look back upon the memories of this unpremeditated past- we are bound to. The new growing campus may, on some distant or not-so-distant date, become the epitome of all that is best in the best possible of worlds, a meeting place for enlightened, avante-garde haute-management. Or it may degenerate into the stale nemesis of dreams relinquished, academic might-have-been.

Whatever happens, we will have the consolation that we started it all.

dash n' gunds (Names by which the two of us were known)

Talking the Walk

We hear about corporates on TV waxing eloquent about Walking the Talk. So I figured I would talk about the reverse.

What does it take to go for a walk? By itself, it is a boring activity, unless you are playing Golf. If there are compulsions, like the doc telling you that it is a choice between your life here and in Heaven, you may go walking, but otherwise, it's like an injection you'd rather avoid..

But there is one reason that you will go for a walk, jumping with joy..when you can talk to your heart's content. Go with a friend who you can talk to without inhibition. Then, the walk becomes an excuse for the talk, and stops hurting.

So talk the walk, instead of walking the talk. You will look forward to the experience!

Good Governance- Lessons From Monarchy

There were good monarchs too. We sometimes forget that. What did they do?

Ideas that work.

Jobs/work.

Peace.

Justice.

They had respect for wise people, many of whom were advisors in their court.

They had a witty humorist too, to break the monotony. Tenali Raman and Birbal come to mind readily.

Did they build walls with the neighbouring countries? Probably not.

They were well-informed, and used multiple channels to get information, including personal visits to corners of their kingdom.

They assigned the right people to the jobs they had in mind.

Coffee Room Banter

That's just a term-the beverage could be tea, which it is more often in my case. But it's not the beverage, it's the banter that is the focus here. We underestimate the power of socialisation, methinks. It needs effort. You can always have tea in isolation-doesn't taste the same. You can watch inane stuff on TV and comment about it, joke about it, or have a serious discussion about the world's problems and solve most of them in the course of one morning -or afternoon. I have done it many times over!!

The tea break relaxes you like nothing else, when you are busy working on something or thinking- we in academics need to do a lot of the second, and it can be hard work, though some think it's vella-giri ( an Indian term for fooling around, wasting time).

Therefore, I recommend a tea break as a restorative, if you are doing something serious, once in a couple of hours. Of course, after a break-up, it's even more important- just kidding!

My Avatars on Earth- 7

 The other avatars- Golf Trainer (above), In Step with the Family (below)

 Above, The depressed listener of modern Hindi songs/remixes/non-music

 The pagdi-wearer with swag in Kuldhara Rajasthan (above), and a chilled-out specimen on a boat in Ha Long Bay, Vietnam (below).

My Avatars on Earth- 6

And then there is the team player avatar- as a team player at IMT (below)- an outing with faculty colleagues.

 As Director-Lighting the lamp at a Convocation, IMT Nagpur. With Esheeta Ghosh and Mr. Kamal Nath, Chairman.

 Mentor to some cute kids-above, mine, and below, from IMT Nagpur (Jasleen and Pragya from the right)

My Avatars on Earth- 5

More avatars. An Irani chai lover, starting from the Hilton at Hyderabad's Osmania University campus (below).

 Author/editor of books- this one's edited, with Romy Saini.

 and the party-goer. Above, at a niece's wedding in Sri Lanka, and below, Bhangda with an international crowd at a conference dinner in Sri Lanka.

My Avatars on Earth- 4

A few more avatars remain. The golfer, for one.

 The Golfer- above, swinging away in Kodaikanal, and below- with Gadgil, Vijayakumar and Dhanapal at Munnar.

 The photographer (above, Mandu), and the photographed, as  Mexican-hat-wearing Indian in Clemson, USA.

My Avatars on earth- 3

The roles I played, admired and would have liked to play are captured in this series. This one is about Bond and bonding..

Above- my longest stint was as a prof. at Kirloskar Institute- students from there are still in touch.

 Above- I imitate my favourite James Bond- Roger Moore, at a wax museum. Below, the bond with IIM Indore gang of trailblazers.

 ..and bonding over dinner, or carrying a Mashal with faculty colleagues, at Indore.

My Avatars on Earth- 2

Being earthy, I have had multiple avatars on earth. This is an attempt to capture some of them.

 Above. Second from left, acting in a play "Waiting for Lefty" at IIMB.
Sudhir Goel Robin Thomas and Sivaram are with me in the scene.

 Above- posing on my parents' Ford. Below- Backseat driving at Jaipur.

Preparing for a political career, at least dressing up for one.

My Avatars On Earth- 1

We all grew up hearing stories of how Gods come in different avatars on earth. Vishnu had ten, for example. But we also have avatars- right here, according to my theory. These are phases in our lives, or makeovers that some of us go through while playing different roles, very different ones at times.
Starting with the Samurai avatar.

 Above- book writer and launcher- Pune Crossword, launching my autobiography with Jaya Jha and Sharu Rangnekar. Below, the Duke of Pleudiry, with the Duchess.

 Above- the reader. Kalyug is writtten by my student from IMT.

The tourist- with Anil Lahoti and Suresh Prabhu.

Bogmalo Beach

This was the first time I stayed close to Bogmalo Beach in Goa. I was impressed by the small community, with one or two good restaurants, and not too much crowd. The waves were of course the best part, and the view, the second best. There was a shop with a lady serving Irani chai too, which to me was a bi.....g bonus. I was reminded of the time when we hosted a Case Conference there. I stayed at a nice place called Swing by the Bay!

The last one is an interior decor idea from one of the restaurants with a bar.

Conference on Literature and Films

This was a unique subject that I ventured into for the first time as a researcher. The conference was organised by the Humanities area of BITS (Goa campus).

My discourse was on Marathi films, which I found (to my pleasant surprise) have improved tremendously in quality, and on an average are better than Hindi films in some years. Apart from the fact that they were pioneers in film-making in India, particularly in the silent film era, when Dadasaheb Phalke made India's first feature-length film in 1912. His own story has been encapsulated in arecent biographical called Harishchandrachi Factory (named after Raja Harishchandra, the film he made in 1912).

An interesting experience, listening to a lot of research on films of all kinds-particularly delightful was a session on Indian documentaries (many made by Films Division and compulsorily screened) by Ravi Vasudevan. My own session had papers on Malayalam and Tamil cinema. There were various views expressed on adaptations as well.

When at IMT, we had hosted a Case Conference at Goa for four years. This was a deja vu kind of feeling, attending one.