Leadership Fundamentals

I think I'll give it a shot. I know there are a lot of leadership theories in vogue and out of it. I studied quite a few while doing my MBA and Ph.D. But these insights are mostly my own, though they may bear a resemblance to theories living or dead.

The first thing a good leader needs is not an MBA, but clarity of vision for his/her organisation. Many flounder on this count, I think. As some great man said, "If you don't know where you are headed, the rest of it is a waste of effort." Just like when you are shaving, it's a good mirror (and lighting) that is most useful, rather than a great razor (I beg your pardon, Gillette).

The ability to appoint the right people for the right job (skill needed- being a good judge of capabilities), and lay out a vision for the key people. So they can achieve it (if they are the right people, that is).

Motivation- the greatest motivation for each type of job may vary, but for some, it is autonomy. For others, it could be tight monitoring (sales type of jobs where targets are what make or break a company).

Courage to sack people is another important one, if you discover that you chose the wrong person or that she is not performing in tune with organisational needs. Merit should count.

I think I will stop here, or else I may be tempted into doing another Ph.D. 

The Van and Other Jokes

Some original ones first.

If you had a Maruti van and you stayed in it, what would it be called?

    Vanvas (in Hindi).

If you were a rich guy who owned a Maruti van, what would you be called?

     Dhanvan. (in Hindi).

....and now some borrowed ones- they are better, obviously. That's why they come later.

The secret of longevity is to keep breathing. - Sophie Tucker

I have just had an operation for piles- all my troubles are behind me. - Ken Brett

There are more men than women in mental hospitals which just goes to show who is driving whom crazy. - Peter Veale

Show me a sane man and I'll cure him for you.- Carl Jung

PJs and OJs

An old classic Ajit joke.

Ajit:         Raabert, Test Match mein kyaa ho raha hai ?
Raabert:   Boss, Vivian Richards chhakke pe chhakka maar raha hai.
Ajeet:       Saale ko sabak sikhana padega. Lunch break mein usse phone milana.
Raabert:   Yes Boss.
Ajeet:       (on phone, to Richards)   Veeveeyun Reechards, soch lo. Tumhari maa hamare kabze mein                  hai ...

Some OJs (Originals)

Why are toes missing from most photo(e)s?

Is it named face 'book' to remind you of something you should be doing-reading?

If a mad man produces agarbattis, what will the product be called?

Insane sticks.

Administration rarely gets any admiration. Is it because it does not minister to the needs of the administered?

Original Jokes

How did corruption start in Karnataka?

It went, "Yeddy, steady, GO!"

How do you spell corruption there?

Karuption.

What does a Kannadiga mind?

Being illegally mined.

How do you describe the result of the recent election?

Yeddy, JD, Go.

How does a Mumbaikar greet Yeddy?

Yeda hai kya tu?

If a Star Wars sequel were made in Karnataka, it would be called....Return of the Yeddy.