No Problem

 There was this ad many years ago, for a bike, that said it was a No Problem bike. Nicely made. 

So, one can imagine a conversation that goes "No problem" as follows-

Someone- It's so hot!

You- So what? No problem. Makes you appreciate the cool weather when it comes.

Someone- There's so much traffic.

You- Yes, but I think about other things while stuck in it. Not a problem.

S: It keeps raining so much.

You- We need the rain, farmers will have no problem.

S: There is so much corruption all around.

You- It could be worse, in some countries, they kill innocent people. There is so much violence.

S: My boss is always putting me down, 

You- Think about those who don't have a job. What's a bit of a problem with the boss?

Cynicism and Optimism

The reactions to PM Modi's speeches are bipolar- you either love them or hate them. The unfortunate part of our history for the last decade has been that cynicism has replaced optimism. Actually, everyone knows the problems we have as a nation AND the solutions to these. In 1991, they were articulated well by Manmohan Singh in his historic budget speech.

It is indeed ironic that it took the (once-in-opposition) BJP PM to re-articulate them for us. And that the same Dr. Singh allowed things to drift in the other direction-away from reform- when he had the chance. Anyway, the lost decade apart, one can still solve most problems by working at them, bit by bit. No one has a magic wand, not the US, not Russia, nor some messiah from above. We need to work on the agenda we set ourselves.

The sooner we start, the sooner we get there. And we have to learn to understand what is good for us as a people- a country, indeed, the world (but after we set ourselves straight). That we need productivity, jobs, health, education and infrastructure stares us in the face everyday. Point is, what are we going to do about it?

This is just a reiteration of the fact that optimism and hard work can at least help us improve our lot. No amount of cribbing or wishful thinking will. We still have a good chance. Let's take it.

Solving the World's Problems

I think we look up to celebrities for a good reason. We think they are who we want to be. Don't we all fantasize about living like a rock star, a film star, a sports star? Don't we crib about how fate did us a wrong turn and did not put a silver spoon in our mouth like it did for some of them?

Now, the celebs are doing us a return favour. They are showing us how to solve the world's (and our) problems. The similarity of the solutions provided by different celebs to a variety of problems is uncanny. And daring. And so simple.

Someone complains that you are loud and raucous in a restaurant? Someone asks you to behave in a sports stadium? Someone criticises the stupid film you starred in? Someone makes snide remarks about your girlfriend?

Well, the Mahatma might roll in his grave, but what the heck? We are made of sterner stuff, right? So, we have the simple solution, namely- ka-boom, spiff, dishum or whatever sound you associate with this single point solution. Use your fist first and think later, if at all. Whether it is a restaurant at the Taj or the Wankhede stadium, or a birthday party, you won't have any problems anywhere if you just follow this simple rule. Remember, anyone challenges you, annoys you, or you just don't like his face, go whoosh, sock it to him. And live happily ever after. Doesn't it beat (puns have a way of appearing unexpectedly) all the fairy tales you ever heard? Maybe Michael Jackson was right, when he said, " Beat it."

If only everyone adopted this policy, there wouldn't be any more problems in this world.