Snobbery was a preserve of the elite (read English Lords/Ladies, Royalty, Page 3 crowd) once. Not so today. Anyone can be a snob, due to the democratised universe that we inhabit today.
I tried my hand at it the other day. Someone offered me a drink. I took one look at it, turned my nose up and said, "This is not a single malt." As if I had been born with a silver tap pouring single malts in my mouth.
It had no impact on the guy who had offered me a drink. "Take it or leave it" he said. So I swallowed my pride, and then some.
Then I tried it in a conversation about sports the other day. Cricket, as usual, threatened to dominate the conversation, so I saw an opportunity arising for some snobbery.
I said, "Cricket used to be a gentleman's game, but what with the big money and 'quick-fixes', it is one for the rogues. Golf, on the other hand, remains pristine, a true gentleman's game."
"Oh yes, only, there are a few ladies involved off-course with the gentlemen sometimes," an unpleasant guy in the group retorted. Since the evidence had been all over the newspaper tabloids over a prolonged period, I couldn't stick to my stand and revel in my sports snobbery.
Then I tried the ultimate trump card- country snobbery. I was in a crowd of mixed nationalities, and I tried the age-old trick of talking about age-old achievements of our country in various fields of human knowledge and endeavour.
"We had some great mathematicians, you know, like Aryabhatta, and many down the ages."
The response was swift and unexpected. "Why do you need a great mathematician to compute the single digit growth rate of your GDP today? You are Ok with learning some basic arithmetic, right?"
I was nonplussed, and vowed to come back with some excellent rejoinder to restore the snob's pride of place. I am still thinking...
I tried my hand at it the other day. Someone offered me a drink. I took one look at it, turned my nose up and said, "This is not a single malt." As if I had been born with a silver tap pouring single malts in my mouth.
It had no impact on the guy who had offered me a drink. "Take it or leave it" he said. So I swallowed my pride, and then some.
Then I tried it in a conversation about sports the other day. Cricket, as usual, threatened to dominate the conversation, so I saw an opportunity arising for some snobbery.
I said, "Cricket used to be a gentleman's game, but what with the big money and 'quick-fixes', it is one for the rogues. Golf, on the other hand, remains pristine, a true gentleman's game."
"Oh yes, only, there are a few ladies involved off-course with the gentlemen sometimes," an unpleasant guy in the group retorted. Since the evidence had been all over the newspaper tabloids over a prolonged period, I couldn't stick to my stand and revel in my sports snobbery.
Then I tried the ultimate trump card- country snobbery. I was in a crowd of mixed nationalities, and I tried the age-old trick of talking about age-old achievements of our country in various fields of human knowledge and endeavour.
"We had some great mathematicians, you know, like Aryabhatta, and many down the ages."
The response was swift and unexpected. "Why do you need a great mathematician to compute the single digit growth rate of your GDP today? You are Ok with learning some basic arithmetic, right?"
I was nonplussed, and vowed to come back with some excellent rejoinder to restore the snob's pride of place. I am still thinking...
2 comments:
India is maybe the wunly country that offered Malted Drinks to toddlers in the form of Maltova many decades ago - now who could beat that?
seems to have had a good effect on you :)
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