Monthly Manthan January 2022

 We are at the close of January 2022. So what happened here? First, the great disappointment. We were hoping that classes would resume in person, but it was short-lived. I did manage to squeeze in my guest lecture in a colleague's class, but in the wake of rising cases, we had to shut down soon. Hope February brings better tidings, and we are able to look back at almost two years of disruptions with some hope ahead. 

The fact is Omicron was less dangerous than its predecessor, though it spread faster. The peak seems over in the cities in the North and West, and the U.K. has pretty much signalled there will be no more restrictions on movements of people. A booster dose is recommended, and I will take it when eligible. Maybe one each year will be needed for a few years.

But I did catch up with family and friends when it was safe to do so. In the process, made friends with a one-year old grand-niece right here in Bangalore. And friends from the past too, at small get-togethers. An online event or two, a Ph.D. student's thesis presentation.

Think of Yourself as...

 The COVID pandemic has taught us many things over 2020. Among other things, that a lot of work can happen online, if we have a decent internet connection and a device like a computer or a smartphone. But if you are still in a funk about all the restrictions it puts on your freedom to move around, travel, and so on, there is a solution.

Just think of yourself as an air-conditioner. Why? Because it has an air filter. Just as it filters the air supplied to its users in a car or home or office, you are sticking an air filter (mask) on your face and thus supplying filtered air to yourself and others you come in contact with. Isn't that a great thing to do? Many other germs that are potentially harmful also will get controlled, and that is good for everyone on the planet, especially those around you. Of course, air-conditioners don't wash their hands, but then, you can always teach them a thing or two, can't you, with your superior intelligence?

Change the Only Constant

Maths was not my favourite subject, though I did well enough in it, academically. All those sub-Maths subjects also did not make any holistic sense to me, though they must have had an over-arching meaning..it was never explained to us.

Anyway, the equations always had a constant. No change, even if you changed the equations.. the constant remained in most. So the statement that change is the only constant is wrong, in my view. It should be- Change (your equation) howmuchever you will, the constant will remain.

Anyway, the biggest change in the last five months has been the Corona pandemic, and the richest people in the world have remained the same, more or less. The airline barons always lived on the edge financially, and they just went a little more red - in the face and on their balance sheets, if there is any such thing-more imbalanced or unbalanced than ever, I assume. 

The makers of food and liquor continue their brisk business, particularly if they also do takeaway. The media and politicians the world over continue to blabber, show how elections (or similar agendas) matter more than lives or anything else and generally make fools of themselves..so no change there.

Corporates are at a loss for words..or maybe are just at a loss, period. Barring those that make biscuits..my consumption alone would have made Britannia millions! Work From Home is the norm, so the laptop makers are smiling..except that they can't get parts from China. There, the Supreme Leader never smiles, because it's a sign of weakness..no change there!

WHO suddenly became very prominent, and we found who its Chief was..small mercies.

If

 The word 'if' is magical. It lends itself to many unknown continuations, many possible endings. 

It's the beginning of imagination, in a way. And we all imagine the world, beginning with if..

If only, my last name was Ambani, or Biyani. I had a student, whose last name was Bihani, by the way..a narrow miss. Right now, Mallya is not a cool name to have, though it was, once.. in spite of the performance of his IPL team.

While growing up, we thought all Anglo-Indian names were cool. No idea why..now, a Nadkarni or Kulkarni looks cool to me. If only we had more sense then,..

If man had been vegetarian, would the Corona crisis have struck? Maybe not, but the plague could still have..rats spread it, I think..and rats and cockroaches are almost indestructible. So there's no escaping pandemics.. and wars are always a good substitute.

In my 60 years on the planet, there were many times I thought of the word if and sentences that started with that word, but now, I am beginning to believe that I really did not need the Ifs. I am quite happy with the way life turned out so far, and the lovely times I have had- even in the current lockdown, because of socialising virtually.

Anopheles and I Discuss Corona

Not the beer, but the virus, also called COVID-19. Anopheles, as some of you know, is my female friend from the mosquito world. She and I have chatted before about many things that affect both our worlds.

Anopheles: Hello again!

I: Hi, long time no see..where have you been?

A: Nowhere in particular, just chilling and staying at home..

I: Hey, that's EXACTLY what we are supposed to do now, due to this Corona thing..

A: What Corona thing?

I: Haven't you been watching the news? Oh, sorry, you don't have TV channels..there's this virus. Called the Corona, and passed on by human contact.

A: Oh, so you can't blame it on us mosquitoes like you tend to all the time,..and what caused it to come around with such great force?

I: Trump thinks the Chinese did it while mixing up some exotic sauces.. but they think it was Budweiser trying to copy a Mexican brand of beer!

A: Hilarious! Sorry, I don't mean to be frivolous, but you mean He and Xi are still fighting?

I: (taking a different tack) Well, that's our lot, isn't it? Battle of the Sexes. Who would want to give up on their Superpower status without a fight? (I was now curious)..don't you have fights between Male and Female mosquitoes?

A: Not at all, the males we have are completely useless, and can't do anything well-not even fight. We do all the food-gathering, and educate our kids about what's good and bad!

She said bye at that, and I said, we would meet again, Corona willing.

Explaining Corona to a Hyderabadi

Hyderabadis are quite rugged, and have survived the plague, Irani chai hotel waiters, and the like. It's not easy to get them to panic. Here is a brave attempt.

Panicking Man (P.M.): (trying to get Hyderabadi to panic)- Kya karre miya? Itta bhi light mat lo..Bahar nakko jao bole na aapku?

Hyderabadi (H): Magar kaiku bolre, bolo na?

P.M.: Ek virus rehta babu, Corona naam ka, unhe jump maarke aapku pakad leta, iske waaste bolre miya..

H: Hau? Yeh viruson ku koi kaam nahi hai kya? Kaiku to bhi idhar se udhar koodrein? Ek jagah nahin baith sakte?

P.M.: Aisich dikhra, aapke jaisich.. ek jagah aapku bhi baitho bolke bolre..ghar mein baithke biryani kha sakte na? Bahar mat niklo bole, uttaich.

H: Chillar kar dere na? Ghar mein baithe to ab tak biwi chillari thi, baahar niklo, kuchh kaam karo bolke. Ab bahar gaye to musibat. Magar biryani kaisa banate? Gosht to lana padinga pehle, markit se..

P.M.: Nahin miya, home dilivary karte katey sab logaan, gosht bechnewale bhi, aur chawal bechnewale bhi..

H: Aisa? Abbich phone lagatun unku.. Begum, tab tak zara chai-ich pilado na,..

..and though he refused to actually panic, the Hyderabadi settled down on his diwan, and waited for his chai..

Why Predictions Are Iffy

Predictions, barring a few, are iffy. Newspapers wrote reams, and business news channels expended hours with "experts" about everything from stock prices, movements of indices, and oil prices per barrel, in the months leading up to the Corona crisis.

And what do you have now?

Sensex at 29,000 instead of 41,000

Oil prices at 30 dollars a barrel instead of 60 and climbing

Consumer sentiment at zilch

Job cuts in most sectors, unprecedented in aviation, tourism and allied sectors like hotels, restaurants (except where they have home-delivery options)

The most-in-demand are doctors who have sane advice, and politicians who have their hearts in the right place- a few may still be around.

Those who keep the wheels running in these tough times, well, hats off to all of them.

Corona Virus

Suddenly, it seems as though the end of the world is near. There is a virus named Covid-19 that resembles a cold or flu virus, and is doing the rounds and spreading fast. Did Nostradamus predict this? not sure, but some novel seems to have talked about it, with the precise location-Wuhan-pinpointed.

Tourism and airlines will of course take a big hit, just when we were hoping that 2020 vision will the world soaring to new heights. What can we do? Wring our hands? No, wash our hands -apparently, the best protection from catching the virus..apart from building general immunity.

Remember, there was the AIDS, Hepatitis A or B, Swine Flu, Mad Cow Disease, SARS and a few other modern-day viruses that were thought to have the capability to wipe us out, but unlike dinosaurs, we have survived. Till now. Here's hoping we continue to..take care, and wash hands often.