Swinging the Vote

I was watching a bit of the election results and "analysis" on the news channels. Results of Maharashtra and Haryana state elections in India. There are a few things that I concluded.

1. Modi is a vote-puller.

2. Rahul Gandhi is a vote-killer.

3. All others are in-between.

4. Pawar may finally be forced to stay away from power.

5. MNS seems to be headed nowhere with their anti-UP, Bihar rhetoric.

6. Young voters are increasingly voting more intelligently than the old ones (our gen) used to.

7. Better governance than the current one is a near-certainty.

Zuckerberg Jokes

Some innovative stuff, inspired by the Facebook founder's India visit.

Which would be his favourite Hindi film?

Jhuk gaya aasman.


His favourite song from Hindi films?

Jhuk jhuk, jhak, jhak, Bombay se Baroda tak, tum kaho gate rahe hum..


His favourite restaurant?

Zak's.


What did he do when his girlfriend ditched him?

Started playing Candy Crush Saga.


What did he say to Modi when he was told "Make in India?"

He 'made' a face.


He went to a meeting with top industrialists and celebrities. The emcee asked him about the competition.

A 'twitter' could be heard among the audience.


When Zuckerberg is tongue-tied, what does he do?

Like, you mean, like, stutter, ..like ..

Modi- A Marketing Genius

This is not about politics, but about academics. In particular, the discipline called Marketing. Whatever may be your political inclinations, one must acknowledge a marketing guru when you see one. I consider Anna Hazare as one, and Modi as another.

The hysteria among commoners and Kings to welcome him anywhere he chooses to go (China, Japan, Bhutan, Nepal are some recent places), is something seen rarely in these days of extreme cynicism. What contributes to this series of grand welcomes is not clear yet. But it is true that a lot of people believe he can deliver. The simple things he talks about in a simple (simplistic at times) manner is a great lesson in communication. We often get carried away by big words and bombast without asking any of the 'marketers' in politics to spell out what they intend to do. A brand that does that in any other category will certainly fail.

The image of a no-nonsense, grounded hard worker has remained, right from his campaigning days. His shrewd marginalising of potential 'competitors' within the party has not been missed by many. His use of the media when it suits him (and staying away at other times) has left people begging for more (scarcity creating 'demand'?). His vision of a great, self-sufficient India has a lot of buy-in among youth tired of old, corrupt and moribund politicians who did little (or could have done a lot more) for the common man.

Finally, if you can market yourself to Americans in the U.S., the quintessential land of marketers, you got it made!

Positivity

There was an air of resignation and frustration in the country (India) during the last three or four years. The rot started at the top. Actually, a downturn in the economy is not the end of the world. Every country has faced one, including The Great Depression of 1929 in much of the Western world. But what accompanied that downturn was a sort of 'waiting for doomsday' attitude among everyone, starting at the top-the PMs' office.

The Modi campaign caught on to this and projected their version of a rosy future (achche din aanewale hain), which got the young voters and old enthused. There was a spurt in voting percentage, and selfies abounded on the social media, showing that someone had voted. Somewhat like the "Yes, we can" campaign that Barack Obama ran.

Now that government formation has happened, all that goodwill must be utilised to do some serious building up of the physical and other infrastructure of the country. The positivity should remain, and be a part of the growth story, before cynicism gets hold of everyone (as it is prone to), and the gains of the campaign are frittered away. This is a great opportunity that the electorate has given- a clearer mandate has never come for good governance to unleash our potential.

Incidentally, Sumitra Mahajan, the Indore M.P. is the Speaker of the Lok sabha. Wishing her good luck and the government good sense!

Unreal Elections- The Book

The creators of Unreal Times are at their trenchant best in this ode to Elections 2014. Nobody is spared in this fictionalised account of the Great Indian Election Drama. The guy who is let off somewhat easily is actually Arvind Kejriwal, and as an afterthought, Rahul Gandhi. But all through the book, until the end, it is pure delight, as the authors give us a sneak peek into the dirty tricks departments of the major political parties, the skeletons in their cupboards tumbling at regular intervals. Particularly hilarious are the interviews that new party entrants go through in both parties, where praising THE LEADER is the major criterion to get in. Digvijaya conducts this for the congress. You can guess who for the BJP.

The major punches are actually reserved for media people Rajdeep, Sagarika, Arnab, Sreenivasan Jain, and Sanjay Jha, apart from the Congress coterie of wah-wah sayers, Sibal, Aiyar, Ahmed Patel and a few others. The first family gets it in the solar plexus, and no attempt is made to lighten the blows on Madam. Manmohan Singh only gets one dialogue to utter throughout, and that is "Theek hai." There is a funny game of KBC hosted for the Prime Ministerial candidates, and the so-called Third Front melts under the prospect of a hot face-to-face debate between Modi and Rahul. When asked to display their personality traits suited for PMship, Rahul baba displays his dimples!

There is a final twist, inspired by the film 'V for Vendetta,' where a surprise Avenger turns up to try and right the wrongs of the rulers and save the country. Cracker of a book, and very topical. Until May 16th.

La Di Dah

Some terms remain with you. Mine were mostly picked up from the gossip columns of Stardust, Filmfare, Cine Blitz etc. which I once read avidly, and some of its writing was actually good. Shobha De was a columnist in one of these mags.

Anyway, here's the lowdown on what some important people are doing today-mostly the la, di and dah types.

Mamata di went to Delhi and talked about Poribartan. The bartanwalis came to listen to her because it struck a chord.
Digvijay Singh opened his mouth. And shut it, before his foot got into it.

Lah -lu gave a speech that was stale as a samosa. Remember jab tak rahega samose mein aloo? It is time for pack-up, it seems.
Netaji put his own foot in his mouth, giving us his two bits about the '3 mistakes' that young men make, and should be pardoned for.

Kejriwal wore a towel and took a dip in the Yamuna..ooh la, la. If only he was a Salman, or at least a John Abraham.
Modi meanwhile had a quiet chai with his supporters.

Dah, goes the Facebook crowd, and puts up another selfie- this time with ink on the finger.
La haul bilaquwat, goes the Urdu-speaking crowd, looking at the general lack of political etiquette.

The Dream Girl goes about selling dreams.
A Dimple (not THE Dimple) dances on Gul Panag's cheeks as she campaigns in Chandigarh.

The show goes on, as it must.

Conspiracy Theories

Did Modi want his supremacy stamped and did he therefore sideline Jaswant Singh?

Are criminal cases against MPs and MLAs motivated?

Did Chidambaram back out of Lok Sabha elections because he was certain he would lose?

Was Tarun Tejpal framed?

Did the Sahara chief get into trouble because he stopped sponsoring the Indian cricket team?

Is there fixing of every cricket match we see on TV?

Was the Malaysian plane really hijacked or is the truth being hidden from the world?

Did that guy in your office get an undeserved promotion?

No one really knows the answers. Therefore, the conspiracy theory is kept alive, and acquires a life of its own. Making the chai-pe-charcha (conversation over tea) an interesting thing.