Marketing Research Presentations Humour


Marketing Research presentations to their client can be a good example of double-speak! See below-

The data is quite rich in detail, so we have 43 charts
Hopefully you won't notice that the results are totally inconclusive

42% buying intention is not bad taking everything into account
Golders Green is probably not a prime market for Pork Scratchings

Consumers mature into your brand
Your customers are dying like flies

This free newspaper enjoys 80% readership in its distribution area
Most people have to look at it while picking it up to throw it away

The car has above-average appeal to company car owners
No one is going to pay with their own money for this rust heap

The image ratings remained stable between the pre-check and post-check
The advertising made no impression whatsoever

The results are correct within 95% statistical confidence limits
The results don't make sense

There was a significant increase in advertising awareness
Sales remained static

There was an increased level of buying interest
See above

We see a clear pattern
It's inconclusive

A clear trend might be emerging
Let's do some more research

The underlying concept gets a green light
The actual product was rejected

It needs fine tuning
Scrap it

Those who read the body copy found it extremely persuasive
Hardly anyone read the body copy

Message comprehension focuses on four distinct themes
The audience doesn't know what to make of the advertising

Once noticed, the pack communicates evocative attractive images
It went unnoticed

Message comprehension was good
Some of the audience could read

We must allow for rough production values
The proposed advertising is incomprehensible

The advertising takes the philosophical high ground
The advertising is pretentious twaddle

The body copy succeeded in conveying a hi tec image
The body copy was totally incomprehensible


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